Hey y'all!
As my internship is coming to an end, I'm tying up some loose ends and finishing things up. Part of my job this summer was to read 3 books and then write something reflecting on my thoughts on the book and my take-aways.
This was the book that I got to choose, and I'm so glad that I did! I have gotten countless recommendations to read this book and so I finally did it. It always feels good when you can cross one of those off your list. One of the main reasons I chose the book though was because prayer is a hard topic to grasp and though I've been a Christian for a while now, I wanted to understand prayer more.
I'm a very structured person in that I like check lists (and checking things off that list), schedules, and clear steps. Prayer is none of this! It's more abstract, and I've had to learn that that's okay!
I'm sure that as I read I used up at least one pen underlining points that hit me hardest or that I wanted to remember the most. I can't say it any better than Miller did so I'll just give y'all some quotes:
"Dependency is the heartbeat of prayer."
"Learning to pray doesn't offer you a less busy life; it offers you a less busy heart."
"Nothing exposes our selfishness and spiritual powerlessness like prayer."
"The criteria for coming to Jesus is weariness. Come overwhelmed with life. Come with your wandering mind. Come messy."
And those are just from the first 30 pages! Miller exposes stories from his life and his family's life that are so raw and honest. It was a blessing to get a glimpse into the power of prayer and not only how prayers are answered through prayer but also how we are changed by the simple act of communicating with our Father. I often find myself wishing that I could be a great spiritual leader like Beth Moore or Paul Miller, but when I hear stories of the trials in their lives to make them better able to help others, I quickly back up and beg the Lord to keep me small. One of my favorite quotes about prayer says that when we pray for patience, God doesn't just give us patience. He gives us opportunities to be patient. It definitely makes me think twice before I pray for patience, self-control, or any other fruits of the spirit. But then I do it anyway.
Also, praying that God would reveal my sin. That's another scary prayer. What makes is okay is that I know that anything God puts in my life is for my good. Isn't it comforting to know that my Father is all knowing and never makes a mistake?!
I recently had a conversation with my boss about how he likes to poke holes in a mutual friend of ours and gently point out that that person isn't perfect. As I've been praying that God would reveal my sins to me, He's done just that. So I replied to my boss saying, "Please don't pour water in me because I know I have so many holes." But God is working in me. He's pointing out my holes and then slowly patching them as only He can. I'm being completely real with y'all and inviting you to know my heart so that maybe it will be an encouragement to you as well.
This book has changed my prayer life. It's freed me to pray with the randomness and boldness of a child. It's helping me to look for the greater picture that God is weaving in my life. I'm so thankful that life is a process and our eyes aren't opened all at once. The process creates a dependent relationship on the One who satisfies the longing of our souls.
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